[x]

Because You're BeautifulSo, can I tell you something?

You're beautiful, no really you are.

You've been battered and broken and pushed and tripped. You've been kicked when you're down, and you haven't always gotten back up. You've done things you're ashamed of, you've cried and you've screamed. You've blasted music and shut out the world, blocked the supposedly caring faces. But you see, you're beautiful because you decided to let them back in.

But that's my point- you're beautiful.

Don't bother showing me the scars because I already know they're there. You say it's the clarity and the numbness that takes away the pain. But I look at the lines you carved into you

The truth about meWhen I say I love you
I mean it.

When I make a promise
I keep it.

When I cry I cry not for one thing
But hundreds of things that I never let out.

When I smile its usually fake
I want you to be happy even if I'm not.

When I text you just to ask nothing
I'm asking for help.

When I call you and say nothing at all
I want you to talk because I'm going mad not being able to hear your voice

When I giggle uncontrollably
I'm trying not to cry.

When I'm left alone
I really want to die.

When I write poetry
I'm asking for help.

And when I say I'm fine
I'm dying slowly inside.

What I want from you
is to hear my cry's.

What I want

Three Simple Words"Are you ok?"

"Not really."

"What's wrong?"

"I...nothing important."

"If you're crying it must be important."

"I want to tell you but I can't."

"Why not?"

"Just I'm scared you'll say you love me and that you care when really you're only here for one thing."

"I do love you and care about you."

"But are you in love with me or my body?"

"You, why would you think otherwise?"

"Because so many people have said they love me only to use me sexually."

"Don't cry. I love you I really do. Why would I have been there for you all those times during the past year only to abuse your trust?"

"Because all you want is to hurt me?"

"I never want t

I Was Going To CryI was going to cry,
But then...
...I didn't.

The feelings were there,
wedged tight...
...deep inside.

I could feel the tears welling,
filling...
...my soul.

Then suddenly
they just...
...grew still.

And the sadness lay on me,
thick...
...and heavy.

Catholic Argument on Being GayCatholic Argument on Being Gay

- "How can you be gay and Catholic? You know the Church is against gays."

+ "Because the Catholic Church has no laws against gays."

- "Ya it does."

+ "Where?"

- "It says in Leviticus that 'a man should not lie with another man'."

+ "And Leviticus also says how many animals you should sacrafice to God, and to not touch women during their period, now do we follow those laws?"

- "No because those are outdated, but this one isn't."

+ "Well, let's say all the laws in Leviticus aren't outdated, Catholics don't follow the Bible word for word, we only follow the Bible's lessons and teachings, laws like not eting

LoveLove is seeing her everyday with a smile upon my face.
Love is seeing that flower blossom into something beautiful.
Love is smelling that burning candle that smells like apples and cinnamon.
Love is knowing she hates you but never being able to reciprocate the feeling.
Love is giving up a lot of things to see her.
Love is laughing whenever you fall.
Love is when she's dressed in the most ridiculous outfit and you still go out in public.
Love is when she finally kisses you, and the world explodes.
Love is noticing the tiniest difference about her on a daily basis.
Love is knowing she'll be there for me no matter what.
Love is touchin

Secret BeneathShe keeps everything inside all day

Only to have it break her down at night

The secret that lies deep beneath her icy veins

Only tears her apart in the end

She's fragile, but strong

She doesn't know that the lies that feed her

Will only be the truth

Embedded deep in her forest of lies

Slowly crumbling with her heart

As she contemplates what's right and what's wrong

No one will know her secret

She won't let this kill her.

Impossible to LoveYou say you're impossible to love
But I love you all the same

Call me what you will
Try your worst, I don't care
I'll never wish you ill
And I'll always be right there

Love is what I can give
With myself and nothing more
It's all you need to live
Even when your heart is sore

With a soul of stone and eyes of ice
You cry yourself to sleep
Never letting anyone in
Because of those that made you weep
Hiding away from life itself
Muddling through without much else

Feeling alone, lonely, and neglected
Your heart still bleeds from pain
You're still the one I've selected
To share my umbrella in the rain

You may not see what I mean

MemoryMy heart swells when you kiss me.

Soft, pink lips dancing to a beat against mine.

I'm putty when your arms wrap around me.

Holding me tightly as if I was going to float away.

I'm not floating away, but I'm swimming in your embrace.

Riding the waves of your everlasting love.

Still Beautiful to MeWhen people tease you for the way that you look,
Please know this isn't your war.
Close the book. Burn the pages.
Our soul is like a piece of paper,
Easily ripped to pieces,
Though beauty is hidden between pages,

You sit still contemplating how to please those you hate,
Will you become one of them, or will you be yourself?
You let your inner demons lead the way,
As you follow aimlessly, is there any point to life anymore?
Your whole world turns grey,
Your eyes go blank; will you make it through the night?

Your life is still worth the pain,
It gets better in the end.
I know because I've been through the same.
My feet have the s

Just Like ClockworkShe is the clock at a quarter to five,
When adults wake for work,
And children finally sleep,
And the fortunate untangle their bodies.

She is the silence,
The uncomfortable pressure,
The words shoved under the table
Decorated by plates and glasses.

She is the intertwined fingers
Of the ones who know nothing,
Are aware of their sins,
But have no need of enlightenment.

She is the coffee –
With too much cream and not enough sugar –
Hastily grabbed in the morning
By a hand already too full of unfinished tasks.

She is bleary eyes
In the sunrise,
In the sunset.
Insomnia caused by a restless mind.

She is night,
Calm a

Masks.Look at her, what do you see?
A pretty face?
The one with all the friends?
Or a girl who wishes for the day to end?

Look at him, what do you see?
A smart boy?
The one who is happy always?
Or a boy who has to hide his scars?

Look at them, what do you see?
Happy people?
The ones who are loved for who they are?
Or people who hide behind their lies?

Look at me, what do you see?
A cheeful smile?
The one who laughs all the time?
Or the broken, bloodied wings which weigh me down?

Look at you, what do we see?
What don't we see?
Do we see the lie, but not the truth?
What kind of mask do you hide behind?

We all wear one.

Okay?It's easy to lose yourself.
It's easy to forget who you are.
It's easy to forget what you want.
And that's okay.
You have to let yourself remember that.

You're a human. A living being.
Your brain might not function the way you wish all the time.
Your body might not follow your orders every time.
And that's okay.
You have to let yourself remember that.

Promise me you will try to do what you feel is right
- only at the moment.
Don't think about what will happen in a year from now.
Don't think about who you will hook up with.
Don't think.
Just let yourself be that teenager you feel like being.
Because it's okay to shout if y

LifelineI have been staring at this phone for over an hour
My finger poised over the "Send" key
I want to send the text

But I delete it

I slowly type out your phone number
Trepidation filling me as the seven digit lifeline slowly fills the screen
I can never explain how much good it does me to do nothing other than hear your voice say "hey, whats up"
Those three simple words are like food to a starving man
A liferaft to a drowning person
Salvation for the damned

I toss my phone across the room with anger

I am not strong enough...

I do not know what holds me back

"What if your busy"
"What if I'm interupting something important"
"I don'

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Flavor of WarIn this never ending cycle,
Lashing at each other's throats,
We fight in this bittersweet dance,
Waltzing in the "Danse Macabre."

We were once friends
So why have we grown so far apart?
A wall is built between us,
Born of secrets and betrayal.

This push and pull in the undertow of hate
Must one day come to its climax
And tumultuous finale.

Growing PainsI remember you as you once were,
The girl with the blonde hair like straw
And the big blue eyes like summer.

Our first meeting, now hazy with the fog time brings,
Two little girls,
Both put together by following the wrong recipe:
A dash of shyness –
A spoonful of happiness –
And more sisterly love than the world could hold,
Despite our blood having not one cell in common.

You were the sister I always wanted,
The girl with the blonde hair like straw
And the big blue eyes like summer.

We laughed together and lied together.
We stayed up all night together,
Popcorn in our laps instead of the bowl,
Secretly watching movi

Song of MyselfI celebrate myself, and sing myself,
The only me I know and the only voice I have.

Whispered words reside deep within the confines of my restless mind,
Until I send them out at the perfect moment,
To bury themselves within my listeners' hearts,
Bringing out emotions never realized until then.

In every fiber of my being there exists the urge to protect.
I fight for those I love –
Against all odds –
With undying loyalty and acceptance.
My tenacity is my greatest strength.

I have the eyes of an artist and the mind of a storyteller.
I can see the golden world beneath the pane of foggy glass,
And breathe my black and white

Revealing OneselfBut aren't you in love with her?
I realize that as I take another step.
One more. Just one more.
My words are caught in my throat,
In my mind,
Buried under the thickness of my tongue,
Asphyxiation from holding my own breath.
One word. Just one word.
The memories take over,
The sweet chocolate,
Peppered all over with bite marks,
Laced through with poison.
One bite. Just one bite.
Somewhere inside my cage of a body
My heart gives out,
Sick and tired of fighting
A fight it will never win.
One more. Just one more.
The metallic taste of blood
Mixes with the salt of a tear.
My lips ache from the lies.
Just say that one word

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Submitted: February 4, 2012
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[x]

As Fragile as a House of Glass

by ~DeceitOfTheMind, Feb 4, 2012, 10:16:42 PM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

You are faking it again –
You know the one I mean.
When you pretend to be happy
You can only injure yourself.
Is that your reasoning?

You're wrong.

The burden you bear is invisible but solid,
And its weight presses on everyone around you.
You cannot do this alone.
You are not Atlas.
You can ask for help.

It's hard.

The cherry red you spill
Tastes like iron to the ground
And licorice to the crowd.
Having a clear canvas
Does not mean you have to paint.

You're hurt.

You are not a little Barbie.
Makeup will not give you
An unbroken smile.
You were not made to have skin
That barely surrounds your spine.

Just breathe.

Hear the whisper as the air enters your body.
It murmurs –

"You are alive!"

– So listen.

You are stronger than you know
And more beautiful than you would dare to believe.
You are here for a reason.

Nobody is born
Simply so they can die.

So do not step off the ledge in front of you.
You know it is not what you truly want.

And believe me when I say
You are loved.
Even if you do not see it yet.

As Fragile as a House of Glassby ~DeceitOfTheMind

Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

_{She can paint a lovely picture
But the story has a twist.
Her paintbrush is a razor,
And her canvas is her wrist.}

Look. It doesn't matter what gender, sex, orientation, color, race, history, height, weight, beliefs, anything you are, you are an amazing person. It can be hard to see sometimes. Mirrors don't always reflect the truth. But it is true. So don't do this to yourself. Don't starve yourself to be more beautiful. Don't cover yourself with makeup to be less broken. Don't hurt yourself to be happier. Because it doesn't work.

I've cut. A lot. I'm not proud of it, and I have the scars to remind me of it. But the thing is, they're scars instead of fresh cuts. I haven't done it for years. I'm living proof that it's possible to quit. And there are so many others like me. So drop the knife before you do something you'll regret, before you dig so deep that you've dug your own grave. I don't want you to die. No one does. Not even you, even if you think you do.

You are not alone.

-X-

Also, if you're my watcher and think this "poem" is random, it's because of my new interest in Tumblr and this blog that I came across. [link]
If you have a Tumblr, watch the girl's video and leave her a nice message, okay, loves?

It could mean the difference between life and death for her.

!Tsuikana Mar 17, 2012 Hobbyist General Artist

_{_{"She can paint a lovely picture
But the story has a twist.
Her paintbrush is a razor,
And her canvas is her wrist."
^Did you write that yourself?? fucking genius <333 ...I kinda wrote it on my arm haha;;}}

~DeceitOfTheMind Apr 25, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

No, sadly that part I didn't write. But I couldn't find the source of the quote. Maybe I should put unknown...?

But yeah, I liked it too.

!MayFlowerxxx Feb 17, 2012 Hobbyist General Artist

Amazing! I love this!

Having a clear canvas
Does not mean you have to paint.
^^ That is probably one of my favourite parts of it! It has been 2 months since I have last slipped up, I have been tempted so many times but I have been trying to control myself. But it is reallly hard when you have relied on it so greatly for a long period of time...

~DeceitOfTheMind Feb 18, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

Thank you.

I saw that you put those two lines into your signature, and it made my whole day.

I'm sad that someone as young as you are feels like they have to cut.

I know it's hard to resist sometimes, but I'm proud of you for keeping from doing it for two months.

!MayFlowerxxx Feb 20, 2012 Hobbyist General Artist

You're Welcome!

I couldn't resist putting it in, it is officially one of my favourite sayings.

Yeah, I actually have just thought about how young I am, it isn't right for me to do something like that, I think it is terrible when people get left in a state where they feel that it is an option to turn to. Have you ever heard Rise Against- Make It Stop (September's Children)? Near the end of the song they read out names of suicide victims and their ages, and they were really young, one of them was only 13. I found it really shocking.

Well, I feel proud of myself aswell, I'll just try and be optimistic and resist. It is never impossible to overcome it.

~DeceitOfTheMind Feb 22, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

Haha thanks~

Oh yeah, Make It Stop is one of my favorite songs!

Rise Against is amazing.

I do hate it when young teenagers think they have to kill themselves. It's sad. =/ But I hope you really can overcome it!

!MayFlowerxxx Feb 24, 2012 Hobbyist General Artist

Awesome!

I hope so too, I have decided to do the 'Butterfly Project' thing where you draw a butterfly or pattern on the area where you would harm, until it fades away. To remind yourself to try stay healthy and everything!

Thanks alot anyways!

~DeceitOfTheMind Feb 25, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

Oh, I was wondering what that project was!

Thanks for explaining.

I think I'll do the same!

!MayFlowerxxx Feb 26, 2012 Hobbyist General Artist

You're Welcome ^_^ It is a good idea!

~Mimemester Feb 13, 2012

can't tell if comments are posting

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As Fragile as a House of Glass

As Fragile as a House of Glassby ~DeceitOfTheMind

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